Ahem . . . Did you know that you have no clothes on?

Ok, I have to write about this girl we saw on a walk around the neighborhood. Mom and I were walking one evening, as we don most nights, and on our route we came across this girl in her backyard sitting on a blanket in a plastic chair. We wouldn't really have thought anything about it except that she turned around and held a pillow up to her chest. It was at that moment we realized that she was naked! She seemed rather perturbed that we were walking by. I mean it is a public road after all. I just don't get it. She was sitting in her backyard which runs alongside the street. So, it was fine that she decided to take a naked day, but the thing I find interesting is that there is no fence around her backyard. It just seemed rather bizarre to me.

The above story then instigated a conversation between Mom and me about the different kinds of nakedness. My brother's friend Sam used to tell us about the 5 degrees of nakedness. Oh my, the way that he would recite it always had us rolling on the floor. It was so funny! Let's see I'm trying to remember them. There was naked: like in the shower, nakeeed: doing naked acrobatics or streaking, nude: like for art, and nacky shacky: is a combination of any two of the others like posing artistically in the shower. For the life of me I can't remember the other one, but I think it went somewhere between naked and nude. Anyway, Mom and I discussed the difference between exhibitionist nudity and voyeuristic nudity. Usually this conversation is spurred on by seeing windows without any blinds. Mom always says that she wouldn't like not having any drapes because then you'd be very limited on naked days. I then would say that blinds or lack thereof don't always come into consideration for naked days. I think that I would still have naked days even if I didn't have blinds, but that would be rather exhibitionist. You would willingly go around naked knowing (maybe even hoping) that someone could see me naked. The lady in the above mentioned story was definitely an exhibitionist nudist. Then on the other hand there is also voyeuristic nudity. This always involves at least two people: the voyeur and the nudist. This is where you have a naked day and don't realize that anyone can see you and that someone is actually watching. Voyeuristic nudity is far more alarming and rather disturbing. I must admit I'd rather be the voyeur than the nudist, but if I didn't know someone was watching . . . I don't know. Over the past year my mom has made a new house rule that there are no naked days. This was activated due to a bad experience Mom had with my sister. I don't think that my sister has really taken this rule to heart. We still knock before entering her room and my brothers are just boys - they don't care!

A couple of weeks ago I had a rather interesting experience. Quite frequently I get questions that are either weird, disturbing or of a very personal nature. I swear at least once I get asked "Can I ask you a rather embarrassing/personal question." I don't know what it is about me that makes others want to ask me these questions. Perhaps it's because they know that I will answer them honestly and that I won't be offended by what they ask. So, back to the story. I was at my friends' house just chatting about everything and nothing when out of the blue one of them said, "Why don't you ask Ali your question? I'm sure that she would know." After a lot of debate and embarrassment on my friends' behalf they finally got around to asking me. The question was "What is an orgasm?" I am very comfortable discussing most anything, but I can't always control the blush that stains my cheeks. So for an hour I had a sex talk with my friends. I was amazed at their naivety, but based on their backgrounds it wasn't totally unexpected. Anyway, so as I'm explaining I'm just thinking in my head "Why isn't there anyone else to share in the humor of this moment?" It was just so funny to be explaining sex and everything surrounding it to these girls that are older than me. At one point I almost told them the "wing theory" just to see if they'd buy it. (The wing theory began about 13 years ago when on a car ride my sister asked how the sperm got in the woman. Mom and I were in the front seats and my sister was in the back. Now, smart aleck that I am told my sister that sperm had wings. So women have to be very careful how they sit when in close proximity to boys. Why do you think girls cross their legs so much? To keep from getting pregnant. When you go swimming you have to be especially careful because you only have the thin layer of your swimsuit to protect you. To this day I am still surprised that my mom let me expound so without correcting me. She says that she didn't think my sister was actually believing it. Not to mention that Mom was trying hard not to just burst out laughing. So that is the "wing theory.") I was much kinder to my friends than I was to my sister. I just gave it to them straight. I did come home and told my whole family about it and had a good laugh. No offense, it was just so funny! In the end I ended up going to the bookstore and buying them a sex book. So hopefully they can get all of their questions and misconceptions cleared up.

On to a new topic, Mom and I bought new chairs for our office from IKEA. They are gray and are super comfortable. I'm actually sitting in one right now. It's the Joakim swivel chair and below is a picture of it. I'm totally loving it!